What'll they think of next? Sure, debutantes have long had their balls, young Jewish girls their Bat Mitzvahs and Latino chicas their Quinceñeras. But why are the festivities limited to only a select few? Well, they're not – not really. Why any girl has always had the opportunity to celebrate her Sweet Sixteen if she wants to. And then there's this other thing… Don't tell me you haven't heard about the latest reason to throw a party?
I'm taking about menarcheal rituals. For those not familiar with that term, it is the adjective form of the word menarche which is defined, according to Merriam-Webster, as the beginning of the menstrual function, especially the first menstrual period of an individual. Apparently mothers everywhere are now hosting 'first period' parties. Do I need to repeat myself? What will they think of next?
I can see the Hallmark cards now:
Adolescence is over
It's come to an end
And now you have
A monthly friend
You've hit puberty
Let's shout for joy
Good-bye little girl
Oh, boy – oh, boy!
Expect some cramps
And bloating, too
Shedding a uterine lining
Is not easy to do
Your head may ache
And moods will swing
But, you can procreate –
That's a cool thing
So what if it's painful
And you retain water
You're a woman now
My sweet baby daughter
Congratulations on your first period Honey!
I realize this is a milestone in a young woman's life, but it just doesn't seem like something you'd actually celebrate…
Now later in life when 'your friend' may be tardy,
but shows up, after all, that's when you party!
~ M.
